


Only Because You Asked

by Anonymous



Category: South Park
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Insecurity, M/M, Nobody wants that ratty ass hat... get it out of here!, Star Trek - Freeform, This is a No Hat Craig work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-15
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-23 10:27:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30054054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: As things always seem to go, factions have been declared and the lines have been drawn for the children of South Park. They're risking it all to guarantee alliances, and Tweek has so kindly asked his Star Trek-loving boyfriend to use his intergalactic communication skills to convince Kevin Stoley and his crew to join them. Craig is not excited about this.
Relationships: Craig Tucker/Tweek Tweak
Kudos: 27
Collections: Anonymous





	Only Because You Asked

Desperate times had called for desperate measures. It had seemed like there was always an issue splintering the children of South Park into warring factions, but this time the stakes were higher than ever. 

This is where Tweek and Craig found themselves, pacing in Craig’s bedroom mulling over an indisputable fact- their next course of action. “Craig, we’re going to need everyone we can get if we want to beat them.” 

Craig grunted and plopped on the side of his bed. He knew what was being asked of him, and he knew the impending doom of the consequences that came with completing his task. 

“It would be so easy!” Tweek exclaimed, and pointed up to Craig’s replica model of the Starship Enterprise. “You know it all so well!” 

_That’s exactly the problem,_ Craig thought. “It’s not about it being easy.” he vented. Wanting to explain more, he opened his mouth to speak but found the words stuck on his tongue. Expressing himself had been something that he had been working on for Tweek, and his inability to articulate his concerns to his boyfriend only frustrated him further. 

Tweek, who was acutely aware of Craig’s shift in demeanor gracefully sat down next to him. He held Craig’s palm out and began tracing a finger along the outside edge of Craig’s hand. A peaceful silence had enveloped them while they both tried to collect their thoughts. Tweek looked up and caught Craig’s gaze, and broke the silence first. “Are you scared?” he asked softly. 

This was a test and Craig knew it, and Tweek’s hand stilled as he focused on his boyfriend’s features. Nobody could read Craig’s expressions as Tweek could, and right now he was staring with such intent that Craig felt like Tweek’s search had reached into his soul. Tweek would pick up on any deviation from the truth instantly. 

“No.” Craig exhaled. 

Tweek could tell he was being honest and didn’t press further. The tracing started again. “Are you worried about what people will think of you?” he asked. Tweek was trying to unravel him, and it was working. His boyfriend always knew how to find the words Craig couldn’t find himself. 

“Not quite.” 

_Warmer._ “So you are worried then. About who?” 

“Kevin.”

Tweeks hand froze. That was the last name he had expected to hear. “Hold on,” he stated, “I’m lost now. You’re worried about _Kevin Stoley_?” 

Craig grimaced. “If I do this he’s never going to leave me alone. It’s going to be so annoying.” Tweek was flabbergasted and shifted on the bed to properly face Craig. Before he could speak, Craig interrupted him. “Did you think I didn’t want to do this because…” _I would get picked on? People would think I’m a nerd? People would think you’re dating a dork?_ “Do you really think I care about all that?” 

Tweek looked down timidly. “You care about all that when it comes to me…” 

That much had been true. Craig may not care what people have to say about him, but he was always picking fights with anyone who had anything negative to say about Tweek. Something was being left unsaid, and knowing Tweek’s insecurities Craig could draw his own conclusions. “Wait, do you think that I fight for you because I’m worried about you damaging my reputation?” Unlike Craig, it didn’t take a telepath to read Tweek. He had hit the nail on the head, and Tweek crumbled. “Honey, I get so bent out of shape ‘cause nothing they say is true. They act like you’re some kind of…” _Scary freak. Monster. Paranoid loner._ It made him irate. Craig gritted his teeth, and unknowingly gripped Tweek’s hand harder. Tweek felt it though. “Honey, you’re the most selfless, sweetest, kindest person I have ever met. I care what people think about you because-” _I love you,_ “because you’re worth so much more than what they say.” 

His boyfriend looked up with wide eyes, but he wasn’t reading Craig so much as admiring him. He pulled Craig into a hug and relaxed completely when Craig returned the affection. Early on in their relationship, Craig had realized that moments like these were his favorite. When Tweek was so overcome that he was speechless and acted on his feelings rather than talk them through. It was as special as it was rare, and Craig reveled in it. Tweek clung to him for a while, and Craig felt his shirt get wet. In the beginning, the happy crying had unsettled Craig. It was so foreign to him, and it was little things like this that got to Tweek the most. It broke his heart knowing that Tweek was crying tears of joy because he was merely _cared_ for. 

Craig could feel Tweek smiling into his shoulder and it felt like the sun on his skin. Tweek sighed happily and then let out an airy laugh. “So, you’re worried about Kevin, huh?” 

Oh, yeah. Kevin. Craig chuckled. Tweek had the ability to make everything else seem inconsequential and meaningless. “Not now.” 

Tweek pushed Craig away from him and held onto his shoulders, pulling his face into the sternest expression he could muster. “Good. Because our friends are counting on _you_ , Mister, and we better hurry before Cartman reaches them first.” 

"Let's do this." Craig challenged. 

Tweek clapped his hands and squealed in excitement. 

. . . . .

They got themselves situated in front of Craig’s computer, and Craig set some ground rules. “The Trekkies take this stuff very seriously, so don’t laugh or you might ruin it. No matter how funny I sound. I’ll do all the talking.” Craig paused, hovering over the call button. He looked over at Tweek. “And I’m not doing this for our friends, I’m doing this for you.” 

Tweek couldn’t respond because the call went through, and on the other side of the screen was Kevin himself. Adorned in fake ears and all. 

“This is Captain Kevin Stoley of the Starship Enterprise, to whom am I speaking?” 

Craig straightened his posture. “This is Lieutenant Commander Craig Tucker of the Starship Andromeda requesting Federation back-up.” 

He had introduced himself using the correct lingo, and they watched as the whole room buzzed in excitement. Kevin leaned forward in his seat. “Back-up? What is happening, Lieutenant?”

How would Craig phrase that Cartman was up to his normal bullshit? “The Ferengi Cartman is plotting an attack and Starfleet Command is scrambling to gather more intelligence as we speak. I need to know that the Enterprise’s warp-cores are ready to make the journey back, as you’re the nearest Constitution-class ship to the Alpha Quadrant.” Beside him, Tweek blinked, not even feigning comprehension. 

“Excuse me, Lieutenant. Ensign Dougie, can you mute the call so we can deliberate?”

Dougie, it seemed, only turned the camera off. A crash of laughter erupted from the other end, and Craig scrambled to mute and shut their own camera off before Kevin could find out that he was unmuted. Laughter was infectious for Tweek, and he laughed along with everyone else even though he had no idea what the joke was. 

“Cartman! Ferengi!” Kevin laughed. “Too good, too good.” The laughter went on for an awkward length of time and took just as long for them to regain composure. “Boys, for that alone I think we should help them. That was so funny… Ensign, restore communications.” The camera turned back on and Tweek and Craig watched Dougie’s face pale as he realized he left them unmuted. He said nothing of it and let Kevin take over. “Our warp cores are primed and ready and we’re charting the path to the Alpha Quadrant as we speak. Please contact us as soon as you get more intelligence on the Ferengi, and we will start our own investigation in the meantime.” 

Craig smiled, “Thank you, Captain.” But before he could end the call, Tweek had lunged and stabbed Craig in the chest with a pen. He made a couple more stabbing motions before Craig got the memo. Tweek, the genius he was, was killing Craig off so Kevin couldn’t bug him in the future. Craig's heart swelled and he barely managed to fake dying off before Kevin and his nerdy goons. He went down coughing and sputtering and playing up the theatrics as much as he was able. Which, in Tweek’s opinion, wasn’t a lot. Kevin and his entire crew panicked at the sight before them but Tweek cut them off by ending the call himself, laughing maniacally. 

Their heavy breathing from the excitement was the only thing that filled the air in the moments after. Craig looked up at Tweek from his slumped position on his keyboard and grinned. “Did you have that planned the entire time?” 

Tweek smiled. “It came to me last minute.” 

“I’m pretty sure you saved me there. How will I ever repay you?” 

Tweek ran his fingers through Craig’s hair, and Craig was hoping with every fiber in his being that Tweek would say “a kiss.” But that answer never came and Tweek looked like he was seriously contemplating the question while scratching Craig’s nape. Finally, he spoke. “Don’t get so angry with people when they talk about me, okay? They’re not important.” 

He was right. They weren’t important, but it’d still be hard. Incredibly hard. “Fine,” he groaned, “but only because you asked.” 

**Author's Note:**

> Live long and prosper, -L.S.


End file.
